"Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard." ~ Andy Borowitz "Anyone who believes that men are the equal of wo...
"Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard."
~ Andy Borowitz
"Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present."
~ Anonymous
"A good conscience is a continual Christmas."
~ Benjamin Franklin
"The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree:
the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other."
~ Burton Hillis
"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, toys not included."
~ Bernard Manning
"Who's the bane of Santa's life?
The elf and safety officer."
~ Catherine Tate
"Santa Claus has the right idea.
Visit people once a year."
~ Victor Borge
“It is the apathetic person that sees the cause while the charitable person sees the need.”
~ Shannon L. Alder
"All I want for Christmas is you. Seriously. Get in the box."
~ Anonymous
"A pinner said: At first I just "liked" it but I couldn't quit laughing so I had to go back and pin it. White Elephant Gift haha . LOve IT!!"
~ Anonymous
"There has been only one Christmas -- the rest are anniversaries."
~ W. J. Cameron
"A woman spent all Christmas Day in a telephone box without ringing anyone. If someone comes to phone, she leaves the box, then resumes her place afterwards. No one calls her either, but from a window in the street, someone watched her all day, no doubt since they had nothing better to do. The Christmas syndrome."
~ Jean Baudrillard
"Christmas is cancelled! i told Santa you were good this year and he died laughing."
~ an icon
"In our town we can't have a Jesus nativity scene for Christmas, because we just can't find 3 wise men and a virgin."
~ Anonymous
“Christmas is a season for kindling the fire for hospitality in the hall, the genial flame of charity in the heart.”
~ Washington Irving
"When you stop believing in Santa Claus, you start getting underwear and socks as Christmas presents."
~ Anonymous
“Want to keep Christ in Christmas? Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, forgive the guilty, welcome the unwanted, care for the ill, love your enemies, and do unto others as you would have done unto you.”
~ Steve Maraboli
"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note saying: “Toys not included!”
~ Bernard Manning
"Meo-wy Christ-mouse!"
~ Anonymous
“Making resolutions is a cleansing ritual of self-assessment and repentance that demands personal honesty and, ultimately, reinforces humility. Breaking them is part of the cycle."
~ Eric Zorn
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